And now, with utmost relief, I will barely be leaving New Jersey for the rest of the summer.

After the Vessel Was Broken We Got Out the Glue

I woke Sunday morning hearing Charlie's voice saying iPad. I went for a run up the hill past my parents' house in Oakland.

Charlie and Jim rode bikes and walked, once on Saturday night, three times on Sunday and he said mommy. He had mommied through Saturday night and was sullen on Sunday and after the third walk at 9pm, he banged and threw -- my table was overturned; I had removed some papers in anticipation -- and bit and he ran out and banged on the same car of the same neighbor.

Jim texted me when my parents were driving me from the vineyard where the wedding was, past the research lab the town was known for before having vineyards and a golf course and a huge edifice of a Target. He said he'd wanted me to enjoy the wedding and most certainly I had but I would have still I think.

My cousin was very beautiful in her long white dress and the ceremony was beautiful. Her husband is from Israel and the wedding facilitator explained some interpretations of the smashing of the wine glass and saying Mazel Tov. I thought of how objects made of clear glass have become something OCD Charlie throws, smashes, as the facilitator was talking about smashing the glass as a reminder, perhaps, of the world's cares amid the wedding joy.

I have not read much of the Kabbalah but I thought of the Breaking of the Vessels.

I thought of how my sister gave Charlie a toy baby Pegasus when he was a baby: Someone had made a montage of photos of my cousin and her husband with Disney clips and it started with baby Hercules, then there clips from the Little Mermaid, Sleeping Beauty.

Sweet and funny and I had some very good talks especially with a cousin, and learned about no-gear biking (my cousin's son showed me the groove on his shoe's sole from using it to stop the tire), and I thought about how fairy tales have the cartoon versions and the ones in German, and the daily work of putting the vessel's bits back together.

Charlie went to sleep after Jim showed him photos of the wedding on Facebook.


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