Midterm Images
A Little Lag

Something Very Sad

This news story is too sad, and awful. Obviously I cannot stop thinking about it; Jim too.

It's too easy to say 'how could that mother have...'. Her neighbor said she spoke of being tired. So far, even when I'm more tired than I've ever felt I've been, I've been able to keep scrubbing, walking, running (as the case may be), going. So far.

This article, by a mother of two autistic sons (one 19, one in his early 20s) -- it's Charlotte Moore, author of George and Sam -- shows the struggle for her sons once school was over (at age 19 in the UK).

Charlie is closer in age to all of these young men. One point Moore makes especially stands out to me: Our kids' development is not 'normal' -- they are developmentally delayed individuals -- so the thought that they would be able to be all done and ready with their education at the same age as other children is ludicrous. I understand all too well why there are cut-off ages; like Moore, I think that is something that needs to be changed and/or that, we need programs in place for our kids beyond when they become legal adults, but are still far, far from ready to be case into the big wide world.

I didn't think about any of this all Wednesday afternoon, which Charlie and I spent together as Wednesday is Jim's day to work late. He got calmly off the bus, asked to get a burrito (that's become a Wednesday routine) and had his happy-joy-sweet smile for the whole ride. He was still hungry when we got home (Charlie hasn't been eating much lately due to his cold) and then we went on a walk. Lots of people were out enjoying the warm weather, from stroller moms to skateboarders.

Soon as we got home, Charlie announced he was ready for bed and upstairs he went. He was sound asleep before 7pm.

Not every day can or will be so peaceful easy. How one does appreciate the days that are.

 

Walking in our field

Comments

Cfer

The story from Sunnyvale is very sad, but also hard comprehend. Planning and bridging and transisitions has been something we've focused on for years - I can't understand pulling your (young adult) child out of a program without figuring what would come next. It just makes no sense.

Transisitions and plans seem to always be in the works or coming up or being tweeked. My son is 13 with a year and a half until he starts high school - we'll work on that transistion and tweeking it for the next 2 years I'm sure. And it's being made with thoughts about him turning 21 and aging out of school and the autism waiver program. It's just what you do when you have a child that needs a lot of support.

It's a marathon, not a sprint.

Niksmom

Yes, we must cherish the good days and moments when they come; they are what carries us through the storms. xo

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